The Calm Coach -Judgement June

A brief Introduction...

We all make judgement calls and sometimes of course, we have to.

What about when our judgement becomes an unattractive part of our make-up?

We may even know it, apparently enjoy it and even if we have changed our mind about our judgement at a later date, we may think it’s too late for turning back.

It’s not too late for either the people judging

or the people being judged.

Here are key questions for you from each perspective

• What basis are you currently judging this person/people on?

  
  

• How do you currently respond when you believe you are being judged? 

  
  

Lets delve a little deeper with some coaching questions to ask yourself around judgement.

10 questions for those in the judging seat

• How quickly do you make judgements on others?

  
  

• When do you take time to see/hear both sides of the story?

  
  

• What specific evidence do you have to suggest this scenario/person is being judged correctly?

  
  

• Why does your judgement matter?

  
  

• When do you look for the good in people?

  
  

• How does your judgement of others make you really feel?

  
  

• How do you feel about other people who are ‘not like you’?

  
  

• How do you feel about yourself?

  
  

• What are you optimistic about?

  
  

• What is judging other people REALLY about for you?

  
  
  
  

10 questions for those being judged

• How quickly do you react to others judging you?

  
  

• How do you manage not taking it personally?

  
  

• What do you value about yourself?

  
  

• How do you feel about empathising with those who judge you?

  
  

• How do you let go of something you didn’t get the opportunity to respond to?

  
  

• How have you educated your 'judge', for future reference?

  
  

• What do you do or say to demonstrate assertiveness?

  
  

• How do you not let the situation get out of control?

  
  

• What are the positives of you being judged?

  
  

• When do you walk away?

Having answered some or all of these questions, (yeah, I know there's a lot!), lets go back to the key questions I posed earlier…

• What basis are you currently judging this person/people on?

  
  

• How do you currently respond when you believe you are being judged? 

  
  

Recognise whats going on with yourself when you are about to make a judgement on someone and question your assumptions.

• What are the facts here?

• What are the real benefits of saying something now?

• What are the benefits of withholding judgement?

• How is the person you are judging responsible for how you feel about them?

• What/who do you fear?

And for those being judged…this is an opportunity to gently educate in an intelligent and mature manner, rising above the potential prejudices in a way that supports both you and them.

or…

just say ‘thank you’ and move on!

See you in July.